QnD Quick Review: Call of Duty: Black Ops

Let me start this by telling about my history with CoD; I've played pretty much every CoD game (except "The Big Red One") that ever came out, on pretty much every platform that ever came out (excluding the handheld PSP).

Most have been from "Good" to "OK" with a few exceptions that were just "Blah!". Those few exceptions seemed to drag the otherwise good series under the bar of "good".

- CoD, the first one, was OK. Nothing special.
- CoD2 was good. It was still mostly a "pipe-run", but the awesome Normandy beach invasion was something you'd never seen before. It felt like you were dropped straight in "Private Ryan".
- CoD3 looked like the previous ones, but the gameplay was uninspired, the feeling of running inside a glass pipe was bigger and it was... in a word "Bleh!"
- CoD 4, ie Modern Warfare, was something I thought I'd never like since "CoD is a WW2 game!" - wrong. The game was good. Not awesome, but good.
- The fift CoD, World at War, was another CoD that seemed to capture the feeling of "no-freedom" with uninspired gameplay and plot. Ie another "Bleh!" CoD...
- MW2 was a bit better than the first foray into Modern Warfare, nearing the "awesome" line. Gameplay was fast, weapons great and game balance good.

Then there's CoD: Black Ops. Do you know what's in common with CoD, CoD: WaW and CoD: Black Ops? They're all made by the same studio: Treyarch.

Now,  Call of Duty: Black Ops, at first, looked like Modern Warfare, but played like World at War. The feeling of The Glass Pipe was still there, not as pronounced as in WaW or CoD, but still. Mostly what pisses me off about Black Ops were the many unintuitive missions and "choices" (I use the word with quotes since you really have *no* choice while playing this game) sprinkled in the game. Oh, and the endlessly spawning enemies.

Take one of the Vietnam missions for example; the NVA is assaulting your position and you're told by the game's waypoint system to advance to the first trench. I did this a dozen time, each time dying to the endless mass of respawning enemies.

At one point I half-noticed, while taking cover behind some sand bags, that one of the AIs was doing something behind the bags. After a couple of more failed tries, I noticed this again. This time I saw he stabbed a barrel and kicked it down the hill.

"Nice" I thought, I'll shoot it and it'll probably blow up. Err... No. Nothing happened when I sprayed it with a M60 machine gun. Damn, that's one tough barrel...

Next time I noticed there were more barrels, oh! After 15+ tries - I finally "got it"; you had to "use" each barrel and they would blow up after *all of them* were rigged with C5, stabbed and kicked down the hill. Well, doh! Why wouldn't the damn AIs just come up and say so. Not do something, somewhere, while mumbling to themselves - not something you're likely to hear in a place where hundreds of bullets are whizzing by and grenades are exploding...

Those kinds of "what-where-why" -moments are common in Black Ops. Sometimes you're left wondering why you have to do something just because it's the "Only Right Way To Do It" (tm)...


As for the graphics, they are OK. Exploding enemies and dismemberment by the heavier weapons are mostly just comic "LOL" moments though. (Uhh, like a magnum revolver or M60 would blow off limbs.) Sometimes you feel like you're playing Rambo The Video Game, and not just because of the Vietnam missions.

(Especially in the end) the game is another "Praise the US" -type thing which has no problems dismembering, neck-stabbing, gutting or just plain wholesale slaughtering enemies and blowing up poor third world bamboo huts, while lamenting the death of one "young soldier" mid-mission in a totally out of place WTF-moment.

Also, the absolute stupidity of the main character just plain leaves you flabbergasted at some points - how many god damn times does he have to get knocked down or unconscious by the same damn bad guy? The only enemy that can, without any trouble, surprise and drop the main guy with one blow does it like 4-5 times? Get a friggin' clue man!

Oh, and of course there are nazis - this is the sixties after all (WTF!?!?)...

So in short? Black Ops is a game with zero freedom, uninteresting plot, cliche missions, cliche enemies and pretty much nothing new, all mixed in a very predictible plot.  The best thing is that it won't last more than 5-6 hours even if you take your time.

So, in keeping with history, Treyarch have made another crappy CoD game. I should be familiar with how the thing goes by now; big advertising budget makes sure the game sells outrageously well while still being a steaming pile of crap compared to the "good" CoD games. Oh, well... It's still a good series if you ignore every CoD they make...

Score: 7/10